There has recently been overwhelming attention given to the deliberation of God and Jocundity: does God have a sense of humor. Any attempt to anthropomorphize God can only end in discomfiture and it is in this consideration that we will pursue our inquest: Does God have a sense of humor?
We begin by considering the intimation that if humans are created in the image of God, then it must be concomitant that God might also then share in our propensity toward facetiousness (and bodily functions).
Still, whether or not God has a sense of humor, we do, and so we're going to enjoy a giggle or two.
The Numbers of the beast
The nature of the beast has been debated for centuries, and there is nothing more frightening than the numbers 666. We know them as the number of the beast. But are there other numbers we should be watching too? It turns out there are. Here is a list of all of the potential numbers of the beast.
|666||Biblical Number of the Beast|
|660||Approximate Number of the Beast|
|DCLXVI||Roman Numeral of the Beast|
|665||Number of the Beast's Older Brother|
|667||Number of the Beast's Younger Sister|
|664 or 668||Number of the Beast's Next-Door Neighbors|
|999||Number of the Australian Beast|
|333||Number of the Semi-Beast (also "Halfway to Hell")|
|66||Number of the Downsized Beast|
|"6, uh..., I forget!"||Number of the Blond Beast|
Don't Drink and Preach
This was Father Francis Franklin McFarley's first time to officiate mass and the new priest was so nervous he could hardly speak. He paced up and down in his office nervously rehearsing his notes, only to forget, then lose his place, and have to try and start all over again.
His mouth was dry, his hands and voice were shaking, and his body seemed to be paralyzed with fear.
That's when Monsignor Martin Mulcahey McGillicutty walked in to check on his protégé. He noticed father Francis' wide-eyed, deer-in-the-headlight stare, and took compassion on him.
"When I am worried about panicking on the pulpit," he said, "I put some vodka in my water glass. Then when I start to get anxious, I take a sip."
Father Francis felt relieved by his mentor's advice, and so he quickly dashed out and found the monsignor's vodka and put some in his water glass and discretely placed it on the podium. At the beginning of the sermon, when he noticed how nervous he was, he took a drink. And then another! and another.
Click here to find out what happened.
Jesus on the Golf Course
Jesus and Moses went Golfing! Need we say more?
The funniest stories in the business
Standup Comedy Routines:
Exploring the Lighter side of God!
- Planes, Praisercise and Jesus
This video was recorded by on of the audience members, but the quality audio is still pretty good.
- The Bluetooth Comedy Tour
This is the best of the recordings, but the other two have the better material.
- Praisercise and Therapy
This was the opening act for Vanda Mikoloski. Unfortunately, the audio on this was recorded just a little hot, but you can still hear it if you don't mind the "noise".
- Installing Prosperity Tech Support
- Searching for the Source
- The Feeding of the Five Thousand
If I had to define Ben Tousey's music in just one word, then I guess that word would have to be! Wonderful! Spectacular! Stupendous! Phenomenal! Incredible! It's the impression of this critic that my son did a wonderful job.
Click the image to see what the critics are raving about: or would be raving about if we could pay them more.
- How Can I Say (I Love You)?
- I'm Not Walkin' Away
- The Lady at the Door
- Morning Star
- Lullaby (The Rose of Sharon)
A Buddhist Story
I was driving my karma, down through my dharma, when I accidentally ran over my dogma.
I had just traded in my Darshan for a brand new Hindu. It was time to reincarnate.
I was with my friend Samsara and we were on our way to the ocean for a Swami.
The accident made me Sikha, and Maya jivas hurt, so I donned my Prarabdha bag (instead of the Gucci).
We metaphysic near Shaman, who looked like a Sadguru. He said his name was Bodhi and I asked him where that was. He said it was Nirvana.
I asked him how far away Vana was, and he said "two blocks!"
As I pulled away, they all yelled after me, "Yoga Gurl!"
The Chronicles of Detective Sherwood Helmes and Mrs. Marbles
Detective Sherwood Helms is the best in the business. He is known worldwide for his authoritative powers of deduction and deductive reasoning and his extraordinary sleuthing abilities. But despite his fame and demand for Queen and country, he is always available for his dear friend Mrs. Marbles.
Mrs. Marbles is a dignified lady who owns a stately manor deep in the moors far from any city or town. She is a Gentlelady, one who runs her manor like a tight ship. She is a gracious lady and her employees love working for her, though they do work hard.
It is among this varied and assorted cast of characters that Sherwood Helms does his best sleuthing, taking care of his dear friend Mrs. Marbles and those close to her.
- There's Marvin Butler, the slightly uptight butler who oversees the manor with worried concern that everything and everyone is in their place.
- There's Jane Maid, the young, naïve maid who takes her job very seriously, but loves to dream about one day herself overseeing a great mansion such as her lady's.
- There's Earl Gardner, the elder and eccentric gardener. He has a knack for keeping the landscaping colorful and well manicured.
- And there's little Justin Case, her young and rambunctious grandson with the typical child's speech impediment, who tends to over accent his esses, takes forever to tell a story and spits a lot while he talks.
* Our Personal Favorites
- Episode 1: It's Gonna be a Long Night*
Detective Helms sat in the pub looking over his notes. He had a long weekend scheduled at Mrs. Marble's manor. Someone had been sneaking into the house and rearranging the furniture in the living room. Needless to say, this was very troubling for the whole household, Mrs. Marbles and her staff. So it was his new task to find a way to locate the vandal so that Mrs. Marbles could rest easier.
- Episode 2: The Poltergeist Mover*
Detective Helms finished setting up his equipment. He would find out who was sneaking into the house and rearranging the furniture in the living room. He set up motion detectors throughout the room connected to cameras stationed strategically placed so that he could monitor any activity from another room where he could watch without being seen. He also set up outdoor motion detectors and cameras so that he could catch the perpetrator before they even got into the house. And now that that was done, he hid himself in the drawing room and waited for the redecorator.
- Episode 3: Jane Maid and the Night Visitors**
Jane Maid snuggled up in the big comfy chair in front of the massive fireplace in the cavernous Drawing room in Mrs. Marbles' elegant English Manor which stood up silently and alone deep in the middle of the Moors. Jane had changed out of her maid's outfit and was now in something more casual and relaxed. She was done working for the evening, and rather than retire to bed she wanted to spend her precious free time reading the last chapter of her romance novel, "Dude with a Tude." She had been through chapter after chapter, following the exploits of Fabrican as he made his way through the town of Dorset one tryst at a time, all the while being pursued by his long time nemesis and ex-brother-in-law Austin Tatious.
- Episode 4: The Case of the Banshee
Marvin Butler tossed and turned fitfully on his large, four-poster bed. It was late! or early if you prefer. Being a butler, Marvin Butler was very conscious of time. Moreover, being Mrs. Marble's butler he had become quite adept at keeping her house schedule impeccably. Marvin turned again and in exasperation fluffed his pillow. Then he roughly dropped his head back down. It was dark outside on the moors and the wind was blowing hard; and dinner wasn't settling well. Perhaps he shouldn't have had that extra helping of Blackened Red Fish smothered in cayenne and black pepper. He had enough heartburn right now to light up London for a week.
- Episode 5: The Case of the Zombie
Newlyweds Judith and Osgood Jenkins sat alongside their aunt, Mrs. Marbles, and cousin Justin Case. Jane Maid, Marvin Butler, and Earl Gardner were also in the room, all of them waiting with great trepidation, as Detective Helms paced the floors. Judith and Osgood have only recently married, and had come to see their aunt who had invited them just after their honeymoon. She showered them with gifts and warmly welcomed them into her home.
- Episode 6: Spycam of the Baskervilles
"I know who the guilty party is," Detective Sherwood Helms said as he looked around the room. The large sitting room in the stately manor seemed exceptionally cold all of a sudden, despite the very large fire burning in the fireplace. The fire and a few lanterns strew about the room were the only light in the room this moonless evening and there was a strange glow on the faces of every person there as they watched and waited to see what the detective would do next. The room fell silent. In the dim light he paced the room, stopping in front of each person and eying them carefully. As he passed, he studied their faces.
- Episode 7: The Halloween Pranksters
Mrs. Marbles was not about to allow that group of pranksters to ruin her Halloween again this year. It happened every year. Every year she was the butt of one prank after another. But this year she had had enough.
- Episode 8: Dividing up the Souls
The boys finally made their way off Mrs. Marble's porch and ran across the moor, paying little or no attention where they were running. They ran straight across the moors and rightto the bottom of an old cemetery.
- Episode 9: The Tattletale Ghost
Little Justin was having a difficult time. It wasn't like Justin to get into trouble, but for some
reason no matter what he did he was being reprimanded by somebody. His latest reprimand
was by Marvin Butler for tracking dirt through the living room.
- Episode 10: The Haunting
Earl Gardner lay his head down on the pillow, and within seconds he was fast asleep. He hadn't been sleeping well recently. It seemed that every night he would have the same disconcerting dream. He would dream that he was out walking alone at night on a small deserted dirt road. The road was narrow and heavily covered by trees and underbrush.
- Episode 11: The Inner Reunion
Earl Gardner had been very reflective as of late. He couldn't help but think of his meeting with his Inner Child. Despite his attempts to communicate with the others about his experience, he could not get the words out. So instead of convincing them that he was okay, he managed only to worry them because of his strange silence.
- Episode 12: The Case of the Closet Boogieman
8-Year-old Justin Case jumped out of bed and ran screaming down the hall to Grandma Marble's room. He was terrified, and his shrieks woke everyone in the house. Justin ran into the room and jumped up on the bed. He crawled up to grandma and held on to her arm as if he was afraid he would be pulled away. Mrs. Marbles tried in vain to console Justin, but he was too terrified.
- Episode 13: The Case of the Missing Kitty
Detective Helms tried in vain to calm Mrs. Marbles. She was hysterical over little Mr. Bumpherals. Through great patience, and many sobs and nose-blows, the detective was able to elicit from Mrs. Marbles the reason for her distress. It seemed Kitty had run off in the middle of the night, and hadn't been seen nor heard in two days. Mrs. Marbles was inconsolable. Jane Maid and Marvin Butler tried their best, but without Mr. Bumpherals, Mrs. Marbles would not be comforted.